Monday, April 24, 2017

And never was there such a difference 
Between what I knew and how I felt
Such a confusion about everything I did
Because I like to think that
I know myself and what I can do
And what I can't
But 
Did I ever think about all of the factors
All of the things to sway me one way or another
That I prayed wouldn't happen
But hoped would
Because it never really was just about me
And at the same time, that's all that mattered
So maybe I didn't know too well
And maybe
That's why it happened.

Friday, March 17, 2017

A Week of Struggle

1) Losing a ring which means so much to me
2) Feeling completely inadequate in lab, and getting the pressure put on by my PI
3) Having someone borrow (but more importantly, break pieces of) my (insanely expensive) model kit that I was given as a gift during my first summer internship

Friday, February 17, 2017

Jhameel ❤

Still ridiculously in awe of the fact that I got to meet and listen to this guy live! Been following his music since 2 1/2 years ago and it's gotten me through quite a few late nights studying.


Sunday, January 29, 2017

You told me the world wasn't ending.

And sure, I concede that, but -some- people's are. You have faith in the system. I do too. But I can't put my whole faith in a system which allowed this to happen in the first place, even if it does allow for it to be fixed. 

What is the price of being called a terrorist?

Monday, January 23, 2017

Acceptance

Isn't it interesting how contentment and resignation are both tied together by a common feeling of acceptance?

I have never before been so happy to get a C.

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Ideals Over Realities

Do you ever get the feeling that ideals are better than realities? Not in the, duh that's why they're ideal, way but in the sense that even if you achieved the ideal you had in mind, you wouldn't really enjoy it? Not because of something you hadn't forseen really, but because of a pure incompatibility. 

Maybe it's not always that we want what we can't have, but just that we no longer want it when we have it. That is, we never really wanted it, just the idea of it.

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Snippets

Every once in a while 
I think back to that conversation we had 
And wish 
I had paid a little more attention 
Maybe saved it 
Because now the words we said 
Fade into time
And nothing seems clear anymore 
I remember I was happy 
And I remember feeling blessed 

But 

There's a reason it's gone 
Isn't there?